I have to ask here, too: What does it mean "to be an Epicurean"? Do you have to "proclaim your faith" so to speak... or can the conduct of one's life and approach to living be "Epicurean" without "being an Epicurean"?
Or who gets to declare if the proper and necessary criteria are met to be an Epicurean – and what those criteria are for anyone/everyone?
In a fragment, Philodemus writes, "...we shall admonish others with great confidence, both now and when those {of us} who have become offshoots of our teachers have become eminent. And the encompassing and most important thing is, we shall obey Epicurus, according to whom we have chosen to live..." (On Frank Criticism, 45; translated by Konstan, Clay, Glad, Thom, and Ware).
There seem to have been at least a few criteria of formal membership to the Epicurean school:
- As Don mentioned, a voluntary Declaration of Faith, similar to the Christian sacrament of confirmation, or the Shahada in Islam (one of its Five Pillars), which reads "I bear witness that there is no deity but God, and I bear witness that Muhammad is the Messenger of God".
- A commitment to study the teachings of Epikouros of Samos in his own words, similar to Jewish children studying Hebrew, prior to, during, and after their Bar or Bat Mitzvah. This also corresponds with the Islamic recommendation to study the Qur'an in its original Arabic.
- A promise to honor Epicurus by remaining loyal to his school, neither becoming a "dissident" nor being lost to the general confusion of the masses. So, too, to various degrees, do we see this with "heretics" in Christianity, "infidels" in Islam, and the "nāstika" of Dharmic traditions.
- A pledge to learn about Epicurean Philosophy and share that education with other students. There is an analogue in the shared intentions of the "sangha" or "monastic community" in Buddhism (one of its Three Jewels) and various Monasteries in Christianity.
- A guarantee to reject beliefs that contradict the teachings of Epicurus; thus, one would criticize those who misrepresent Epicurus (for example, believing him to have been a shameless glutton) or misinterpret the principles of Epicurean Philosophy.
That is not to say that that there cannot be epicurean spirits who sympathize with the Epicurean school, while simultaneously denying their identities as students, but there is a significance to one's formal recognition, like "how many years have you been sober ... from addiction to metaphysics?" or "how old were you when you 'came out' to your parents ... that you reject their traditional religion?" As I often reinforce, the modern world, itself, is generally epicurean in outlook, since it makes assumptions and takes for granted beliefs that are evident of the Epicurean school.
In the end, I may not be an Epicurean – let alone a “good Epicurean”. And that’s okay.
In the end, none of us are (i.e. none of us will exist).